OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
