Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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