after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
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It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
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Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
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