So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
4 words: hood of his car
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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