Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
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then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
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The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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