Please, let me fuck your mom
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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