That's when you crack a 10am beer
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
