Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
