I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
