she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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