we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
ttyl tear gas
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
