Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
