Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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