So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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