His hands were made for my vagina.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
