Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
