so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize