Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
A+ Viking dick
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize