Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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