Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
