So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
