Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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