It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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