Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
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