Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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