So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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