Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
