What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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