Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I pour the whiskey from now on
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
