i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
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Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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