i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
