lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
