I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
