Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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