At least make sure they are 18
Why
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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