Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
