WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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