I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
