Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
this boner is exhausting
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
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