You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
