my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
They took my balls.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
