So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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