wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Redeem this text for a blowjob
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
