is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Randomize