Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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