lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
