it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
You ruined the universe
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
