Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize