i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize