For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
My life is pants optional.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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